Proposed Video Game Tax is a "Kids-Kids Thing"

As a lifelong video game player and practically geriatric 35-year-old, I just want to chime in and express my solidarity with a new proposed Wisconsin-based sales tax on video games, because as I always say, "Get 'em while they're young!"

Says Wisconsin Senator and bill author Jon Erpenbach, the money raised from the tax isn't meant to dissuade gamers or put a negative spin on games, but to help cover the cost of moving 17-year-olds who commit non-violent crimes back into the juvenile system.

Well spoken, sir, well spoken. All our kids making minimum wage flipping burgers and waiting tables and dressing up like elves at Christmas to help our children pose with Santa for a picture and a candy cane, let's make them pay, as you say, by kids, for kids, because when is A not equal to A, right?

And who cares (not me!) that imposing a tax on just about any salable product is viewed by the masses as a mark of shame, sort of the way we don't tax cigarettes to pay chemical manufacturers to put more arsenic, benzene, and formaldehyde in their next batch of coffin nails. Well to heck with the masses, I say. What do they know anyway?

Oh, and while we're talking, maybe you'd like to consider my idea for a wheel tax to help fund public sex education, because let's face it, tires are made out of rubber, and well, condoms are too.

Hey, that gives me another idea! How about a general driving tax based on the number of tire rotations completed every mile to help fund NASA's space program (automatically deductible from a mandatory electronic bank account) because tires move in circles, and after all, so does the space shuttle.

Kids-for-kids, rubber-for-rubbers, gyration-for-rotation, see the pattern here?

Heck, why not an R-rated movie tax to help pay for elderly eye-care? By adults, for adults, and last I checked, you can't watch a movie without using your eyes. Well, unless you're Uri Gellar, anyway.

So yeah, I'm with you Senator Erpenbach. I get it. Let's tax our lovable little'uns, because I can't imagine a better way to fund our juvie system. Nope, not a one.

P.S. Is there any way we could put an age cap on the tax? You know, since you say it's a "kids-kids" thing, which pretty obviously means you're not talking about the ESA's "sixty-seven percent of American heads of households play computer and video games" statistic. I assume "heads of households" means adults (not kids), but maybe I'm out on a limb there. As long as we keep the tax focused on kids (again, your own words) I say let's soak 'em for every hard-earned dollar -- and hey, some of them can probably count their daily earnings in dollars! -- they've got.

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